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10-01-2005, 07:34 PM #1
BORDER CONTROL JOBS OUTSOURCED TO MEXICO
http://www.borowitzreport.com/archive_r ... ch=illegal
Thursday, March 31, 2005
BORDER CONTROL JOBS OUTSOURCED TO MEXICO
Setback for Homeland Security, Critics Say
In what some critics of illegal immigration are calling a setback for homeland security, 500 border control agents hired just this week learned today that their jobs were being outsourced to Mexico.
“In a perfect world, it would be great to have American border control agents on the U.S. side of the border,� said Secretary of Homeland Security Michael Chertoff. “Having said that, we are going to save a bundle by having those same functions performed by Mexicans on the Mexican side of the border.�
Recognizing that the outsourcing decision will not endear him to critics of the Administration’s immigration policies, Mr. Chertoff said, “I fully expect Lou Dobbs to rip me a new one.�
Nevertheless, Mr. Chertoff said, starting Monday the U.S. will scrap traditional border patrols and replace them with what he called a “state of the art border-control calling center� located in a suburb of Guadalajara.
The plan calls for prospective illegal aliens to telephone the calling center with the approximate time and place they intend to sneak over the border to the U.S.
Hoping to silence criticism of the controversial plan, President Bush addressed the immigration issue head on today in a speech in Grand Rapids, Michigan: “To those who would illegally enter our country seeking jobs, let me say this: stay where you are, and eventually our jobs will come to you.�
Elsewhere, prosecutors will be allowed to introduce five more witnesses in the Michael Jackson trial but they will not be allowed to call them The Jackson Five.I stay current on Americans for Legal Immigration PAC's fight to Secure Our Border and Send Illegals Home via E-mail Alerts (CLICK HERE TO SIGN UP)
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10-01-2005, 07:43 PM #2
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The plan calls for prospective illegal aliens to telephone the calling center with the approximate time and place they intend to sneak over the border to the U.S.
Recognizing that the outsourcing decision will not endear him to critics of the Administration’s immigration policies, Mr. Chertoff said, “I fully expect Lou Dobbs to rip me a new one.�
This man has absolutely no shame whatsoever--and not much common sense.http://www.alipac.us Enforce immigration laws!
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10-01-2005, 07:46 PM #3
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Tell me this a science fiction script for some new halloween horror move comming out the end of the month.
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10-01-2005, 07:49 PM #4
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I'm sending this post to my congressman with some ugly words attached. I suggest everyone else do the same.
Talking about lets throw the border gates wide open. What utter idiotic fool would come up with such dribble.Join our efforts to Secure America's Borders and End Illegal Immigration by Joining ALIPAC's E-Mail Alerts network (CLICK HERE)
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10-01-2005, 07:52 PM #5
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Bush is putting lawyers in charge of crime control not cops. Look at your court system, ran for lawyers by lawyers now your national security is going down the same sewer .
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10-01-2005, 07:58 PM #6
I think this may be a spoof site....
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10-01-2005, 08:11 PM #7
It is a spoof
The Borowitz Report
Winner of the First-ever National Press Club Award for HumorI stay current on Americans for Legal Immigration PAC's fight to Secure Our Border and Send Illegals Home via E-mail Alerts (CLICK HERE TO SIGN UP)
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10-01-2005, 08:23 PM #8
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oh come on lets let it stay I was going to hit on the Jackson 5 thing next.
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10-01-2005, 08:25 PM #9
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Originally Posted by Charlesoakisland
But it could be true because the above is. look at the appointments bush is making .Join our efforts to Secure America's Borders and End Illegal Immigration by Joining ALIPAC's E-Mail Alerts network (CLICK HERE)
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10-02-2005, 06:02 AM #10
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Hahahah, it us a good one. They should be making statements like that, oh they are but they are making it sound like a good thing and wording it differently.
"I can because I will, I will because I can" ME
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