Thread: How Scooter Libby Can Avoid Prison

John W. Lillpop


A federal appeals court has refused to intervene and delay Scooter Libby's prison sentence for the non-crime he was convicted of.

Guardian: http://www.guardian.co.uk/worldlatest/s ... 42,00.html



This is dreadful news for a dedicated public servant and loyal trooper in the Bush administration.

What a pity that President Bush is so pre-occupied with entertaining Russian communists and trying to legalize 12-30 million invading criminals. Attending to those noble causes simply does not leave the president with enough time to help a beleaguered soul like Scooter Libby.

Still, not all is lost. Herewith my plan for Scooter to avoid prison while enriching himself at the same time.

To start, Scooter must immediately change his name to Jose` Libbernandez and assume a Spanish accent. A fake ID, including Social Security number and drivers license, can be purchased directly from Ted Kennedy out of his office on Capitol Hill.

Next, Scooter needs to scurry on down to Mexico and secure a respectable amount of marijuana, cocaine, and heroine. Then steal across the border into the U.S. at a location where you are most likely to be spotted by Border Patrol agents.

When an agent spots you, make a U-turn and start running back towards Mexico.

At that point, because they are racist pigs, the Border Patrol will start chasing you and will most probably shoot you in the butt.

Do not panic: Your ship has finally come in!

After the Border Patrol has arrested you, Mr. Jose` Libbernandez, you will be allowed one call.

Use this call wisely by contacting the nearest ACLU office, and tell them you are an illegal alien who has been shot in the ass by the Border Patrol on the American side of the border. Be sure to mention that you were shot while smuggling drugs into the U.S.

Within 10 minutes or so, an ACLU lawyer will arrive at your cell to greet and comfort you. He or she will immediately begin working on your behalf, and will text message Attorney General Gonzalez to inform him of your plight.

Before you are actually booked, the Gonzalez goons, in concert with the ACLU, will have bailed you out of jail and arrested all of the offending Border Patrol agents to take your place.

You will then be granted immunity from any and all crimes in exchange for your testimony against the criminals, those punks who until two hours ago were Border Patrol agents.

Early next morning, your ACLU lawyer will visit you in your executive suite at the finest hotel in town (paid for by the DOJ) and get you to sign documents needed to sue the former Border Patrol agents, the U.S. government, and all conservative radio talk show hosts.

Provided the ACLU can find the right leftist judge and a rigged jury, you could be rewarded for your troubles with a five million-dollar judgment!

That is nearly what you would have hauled in by selling all those drugs, Scooter!

What's that, Scooter? You are concerned that George W. Bush might intervene and pardon the former border patrol agents and otherwise try to do the right thing?

Forget it!

Remember, you are Jose` Libbernandez, a good hearted, hard working peasant who just came here to do work that Americans will not do! You are now part of a protected class, a man to who rule of law does not apply.

Welcome home!

How true it is ... !!

JUST HEARD ON Lou Dobbs

Libby's prison sentence has been commuted
meaning he wont be going to prison.

but yet this stupid A$$ president leaves 3 law enforcement officials in prison for doing their jobs on the border and a 4th in prison for adopting his wifes nieces

Perjury; civil vs criminal.

In criminal cases perjury is a crime and subject to prosecution. In civil cases perjury is not a crime and never prosecuted. My question is whether Libby’s case was criminal and Clinton’s case was civil. If there is a difference, the two cannot be compared.

I don’t see a lot of difference in Bush’s respect for the rule of law and Saddam’s. What I am hearing from the public is "as far as I am concerned, Libby did nothing wrong." That is the sum of things in a nut shell. This is Bush's attitude also.