Thread: Ted Cruz’s Heart May Go on, but His Campaign Won’t

Ted Cruz’s Heart May Go on, but His Campaign Won’t
January 28, 2016
By Matt Forney

Ted Cruz is a two-bit con artist who’s representative of the fetid, cuckservative swamp that is Texas politics. Fortunately, Iowans are waking up to his shell game.

While I’m generally good at spotting narcissists and psychos, my great weakness is that I often let the opinions of my friends override my better judgment, which has blown up in my face more than once. For instance, the first time I saw Ted Cruz, I immediately wrote him off as a slimy fraud who was using conservatives to advance his personal agenda. Then a friend of mine told me that Cruz was a good guy because of his work fighting for conservative causes in court, so I gave him a second chance. And once again, I got hoodwinked.

I had the great displeasure of attending the Cruzin’ to Caucus pro-life rally in West Des Moines last night, and I can safely say that Ted Cruz is one of the most disgusting people I’ve ever shared a room with. Considering that I’ve been to a Hillary Clinton rally, that’s a strong statement. Cruz’s down-home huckster countenance, combined with his autistic inflexibility, left me wanting to hurl.

Ted Cruz’s claim to fame in the presidential race is his bizarre, BPD-esque relationship with Donald Trump. When Trump entered the race last summer, Cruz was the only candidate who didn’t immediately try to garrote him for being “bigoted.” Most assumed that he was either angling to be Trump’s running mate or hoping to pick up the man’s supporters should he drop out of the race. Turns out that Cruz was just trying to calculate the precise angle at which to plunge his knife into the Donald’s back.

I’m not the only one to pick up on this: virtually everyone who knows Ted Cruz despises him. He’s universally loathed in the Senate for his stubbornness and know-it-all attitude, and he so irritated George W. Bush that he refused to give Cruz a patronage job after his work on Bush’s 2000 presidential campaign. Cruz’s repugnance is so epic that he even forced Iowa Governor Terry Branstad to denounce him, breaking his promise of neutrality.

Granted, Cruz’s achievements as a lawyer defending conservative values are indeed commendable, in the same way that a mafia goon’s ability to dispose of corpses is worthy of praise. But you don’t vote a mafia goon into the White House. You especially don’t vote mafia goons who lie about taking felony levels of Goldman Sachs money into the White House.

I arrived at the Cruzin’ to Caucus rally forty-five minutes early and was able to score a seat in the front. Despite Cruz’s pretensions to being Trump’s number one opponent in Iowa, the turnout was anemic: five hundred people tops, and primarily old people at that. In a moment of unintended hilarity, when the Cruz people started playing music, the first song was “Life is a Highway” by Tom Cochrane, who is Canadian.

Though the rally was called “Cruzin’ to Caucus”—I’m not making that up—a more honest name would have been “Donald Trump Is a Big Meanie,” as virtually all of the speakers (including Cruz) spent their time grousing about the man. The rally was emceed by former Texas governor and walking malapropism machine Rick Perry, who was forced to quit the presidential race in embarrassment after Trump mocked him for wearing glasses in order to look smart.

Cruz has a real knack for ambiguously gay relationships with other men, as Perry breathlessly told the crowd the story of how Cruz offered to hang out with him for a day so they could get to know each other better. After a few hours of drinking near beer and playing marbles, Perry was convinced that he had peered into Cruz’s soul and seen the light of God. I also had to stifle a laugh at Perry’s Freudian slip: he referred to Cruz and Rep. Steve King (R-IA) as “convicted conservatives.”

But the real star of this standard cuck party was the CEO of FAMiLY LEADER [sic], Bob Vander Plaats. A gangly gelding with a disturbingly punchable face, Vander Plaats spent a good fifteen minutes whining about what a big jerk Trump is. I actually saw tears welling up in the man’s eyes as he recounted how Trump had the audacity to start a Twitter war with him.

All this was a warm-up act for the chief slimeball himself. And when Ted Cruz took the stage, the first order of business was—you guessed it—Donald Trump:

https://www.righton.net/2016/01/28/t...campaign-wont/

(After what happened in Iowa on Caucus Day from Steve King and his "I know things" lie about Trump and his endorsements and Steve King's tweet lie about Carson suspending his campaign to Ted Cruz and Rick Tyler's emails, voice mails and tweets telling Caucus Voters for Carson to vote for Cruz because Carson was suspending his campaign to the disgusting mailer fraud telling voters they were in violation and to fix it vote for Cruz, there's no doubt that this article is more right-on that even the author knew when he wrote it a week earlier.)

Surprise, surprise, surprise. A hit piece from an adamant Trump supporter from Chicago!

Matt Forney

Contributor

Matt Forney is a Chicago-based author and journalist. He blogs at MattForney.comand is the author of several books, including Confessions of an Online Hustler. Matt's work has also been featured at Return of Kings, Taki's Magazine, Alternative Rightand many other sites, and he also served as the editor of Reaxxion, a gaming website for men.