http://www.therant.us/staff/guest/adams/11282005.htm

We Can’t Hire Enough Border Patrol Agents? I’ve Got an Idea…
USA/Jeff Adams
November 28, 2005 - I keep hearing how President Bush was provided plenty of money by Congress to hire more than enough Border Patrol agents to address our needs, but instead of hiring the thousands needed, Bush gives us a couple hundred. What’s up with that?

Homeland Security Chief Michael Chertoff has backed off his earlier comments about aggressively working to deport illegals. Now he says that it’s not practical to deport the millions of illegals that are roaming about our country. Obviously Mr. Chertoff initially spoke without permission and his boss, GWB, has spanked his bottom and has him now singing from the appropriate page in the neo-con hymnal. Yes, Chertoff is singing the ‘Guest-worker Polka’ along with every other establishment stooge that wants to sell out our country.

While the money has been supposedly appropriated to get the manning needed to round up and deport all the illegals in our country, Chertoff is going around saying that it’s not financially feasible. According to Chertoff, there are limitations to his ability to train all the agents needed in part because of a lack of facilities.

Well, first off, when did financial constraints every stop the feds from doing anything? Second, if facilities are a problem, again spend more money! That’s what government does best; after all they just print more money when they want it (notice I didn’t say ‘need it;’ there is a difference). Better yet, I’m sure there are lots of communities that would love to do their civic duty and provide space in their towns (such as civic centers, schools, community colleges, and other available venues) for use in getting more agents up to speed.

But for just a moment, let’s contemplate the possibility that someone in the federal government is actually concerned with being fiscally responsible. In their heart of hearts, they believe they are limited financially and are trying to be a good steward of the public trust. They honestly can’t, in their mind, justify hiring thousands of agents due to what they perceive as financial limitations. So what can we do to help? I’ve got an idea.

If the law enforcement agencies can’t muster enough manpower to enforce our laws, we need to turn to a tried and true tradition in America: the bounty hunter. I’m not talking about a bunch of loners recklessly roaming the countryside grabbing anyone and everyone they ‘suspect’ of being an illegal and dragging them into some sheriff’s office.

Bounty hunters today are licensed individuals that work by a set of regulations to carry out their jobs. In fact Bounty Hunters have an association, and they are working to bring a professional atmosphere to their line of work. In fact, one bounty hunter I met recently in Oklahoma commented on his dislike of the appearance and actions of Duane ‘Dog’ Chapman from the A&E show ‘Dog the Bounty Hunter,’ as he thought Chapman misrepresented the professionalism of most bounty hungers. (That may be, but the few times I’ve seen the show I thought it was funny, and Dog has good intentions, even if it’s hard to tell the crooks from the bounty hunters based on how Chapman and his crew look.)

Think about it, licensed, professional bounty hunters (a.k.a. fugitive enforcement agents, a most appropriate title for those tracking down illegal aliens) working their normal territory, but adding to their list of criminals to round up all the illegals that swarm across our land. With the amount of available work in rounding up illegals, I think you’d see a huge growth spurt in the bounty hunter industry. Why, all those American workers displaced by the low-wage-accepting illegals could now find work rounding up the very folks who have prevented them from getting a regular job. Some might call this a delicious irony, but I would simply call it justice.

I’m sure there are those who will howl in dismay at this idea. They’ll come out with the usual bleeding heart liberal clap-trap about it being ‘mean,’ ‘racist,’ ‘promoting violence,’ and a number of other idiotic view points. I can only say to these people, “Look wimps, the head of Homeland Security himself has declared his inability to enforce our laws. The Minutemen have already stepped up and made the first move in civic duty to help watch our borders, it is now time for the next move in getting American citizens active in defending our sovereignty, our territorial integrity, our laws, and our culture.�

Congress has been looking for a face-saving easy out, and The Minutemen have shown how easy it is to protect our border. It’s time to take things to the next level and let the free enterprise system kick in. Letting bounty hunters collect a small fee for rounding up and handing illegals over to the appropriate authorities for deportation not only would contribute to our security and sovereignty, but would actually be much more cost effective than adding more Border Patrol agents to the government dole.

I’m sure Mexico would scream over this idea as loud as the liberals in this country, but that’s only because we would have enacted an effective plan to thwart their goal of ‘Reconquista.’ In fact, one good way to check if an idea to address illegal immigration is a good one is if you see liberals and Mexicans screaming and doing the ‘funky chicken’ over it (hint: if they do, you are on the right track). If the EU were to get indignant over the use of bounty hunters, I would only have one word for them: France.