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What if...?
Doug Bower


Doug Bower is a freelance writer and book author. His most recent writing credits include The Atlanta Journal-Constitution, The Houston Chronicle, The Philadelphia Inquirer, and Transitions Abroad. He is a columnist with Cricketsoda.com and the Magic City Morning Star. His newest book Mexican Living: Blogging it from a Third World Country can now be seen at Mexican Living

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By Doug Bower
July 3, 2005

I have been thinking for days this question: What if all the "We want the "Legal and Illegal" Mexican Migrant Workers who are, among many things, brutalizing our schools with that demonic language of theirs" got their way and all the illegals were deported overnight?

What if the Feds could find a way and did it and all the Mexicans, and believe me when I say they want all the Mexicans out of Dodge, were gone? What if this happened when you got up tomorrow morning?

I am sure that there would a cacophonous jubilee as not seen before in human history. I think there would be a lot of men (and who knows maybe some women) dressed in cowboy costumes, six-shooters strapped to each hip, and of course confederate flags the size of Long Island flapping in wind.

When all the celebration got over with just what do you think would happen?

Let me ask you a few questions:

1. The Minuteman and their supporters blame the rising cost of health care on the alleged fact that illegals get free medicine and care.

Do you believe for one stinking moment that the cardiologist, the neurologists, the oncologists, and every other "ologist" you can think of would suddenly lower their $150.00 office call fees overnight because of the disappearance of the illegals?

Do you think that you would be able to walk into your Family Practice Doctor's office and only have to pay less than $15.00 for an office call like you can in Mexico?

Do you think you would suddenly be able to get your pap smear, gynecological exam, and mammogram for less than $99.00 like you can here in Mexico?

Do you think the cost of a hospital stay would overnight drop from a million dollars per second to a few bucks a night?

Is this what you people are actually thinking?

2. The Minuteman and their supports accuse illegals of:

"…corrupting our political and social institutions, favoring political and social radicalism, agitating for more transfer programs, and so on."

Do you people really believe that fruit pickers and hotel maids who live in constant fear of detection of their illegal status are going to raise that kind of hell and risk getting their illegal status revealed? And do you really expect the world to believe that they have the intellectual sophisticationâ€â€