Results 1 to 5 of 5

Thread Information

Users Browsing this Thread

There are currently 1 users browsing this thread. (0 members and 1 guests)

  1. #1
    Senior Member Gogo's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2007
    Location
    Alipacers Come In All Colors
    Posts
    9,909

    A Cowboy Named Bud

    A cowboy named Bud was overseeing his herd in a remote mountainous pasture in Montana when suddenly a brand-new BMW advanced out of a dust cloud towards him.

    The driver, a young man in a Brioni suit, Gucci shoes, RayBan sunglasses and YSL tie, leans out the window and asks the cowboy, 'If I tell you exactly how many cows and calves you have in your herd, Will you give me a calf?'

    Bud looks at the man, obviously a yuppie, then looks at his peacefully grazing herd and calmly answers, 'Sure, Why not?'

    The yuppie parks his car, whips out his Dell notebook computer, connects it to his Singular RAZR V3 cell phone, and surfs to a NASA page on the Internet, where he calls up a GPS satellite to get an exact fix on his location which he then feeds to another NASA satellite that scans the area in an ultra-high-resolution photo.

    The young man then opens the digital photo in Adobe Photoshop and exports it to an image processing facility in Hamburg, Germany

    Within seconds, he receives an e-mail on his Palm Pilot that the image has been processed and the data stored. He then accesses a MS-SQL database through an ODBC connected Excel spreadsheet with email on his Blackberry and, after a few minutes, receives a response.

    Finally, he prints out a full-color, 150-page report on his hi-tech, miniaturized HP Laser Jet printer and finally turns to the cowboy and says, 'You have exactly 1,586 cows and calves.'

    'That's right. Well, I guess you can take one of my calves,' says Bud.

    He watches the young man select one of the animals and looks on amused as the young man stuffs it into the trunk of his car.

    Then the Bud says to the young man, 'Hey, if I can tell you exactly what your business is, will you give me back my calf?'

    The young man thinks about it for a second and then says, 'Okay, why not?'

    'You're a Congressman for the U.S. Government', says Bud.

    'Wow! That's correct,' says the yuppie, 'but how did you guess that?'

    'No guessing required.' Answered the cowboy. 'You showed up here even though nobody called you; you want to get paid for an answer I already knew, to a question I never asked. You tried to show me how much smarter than me you are; and you don't know a thing about cows...this is a
    herd of sheep. . .


    Now give me back my dog.
    Join our efforts to Secure America's Borders and End Illegal Immigration by Joining ALIPAC's E-Mail Alerts network (CLICK HERE)

  2. #2
    Senior Member crazybird's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2006
    Location
    Joliet, Il
    Posts
    10,175


    Ain't that the sad truth!!!!!
    Join our efforts to Secure America's Borders and End Illegal Immigration by Joining ALIPAC's E-Mail Alerts network (CLICK HERE)

  3. #3
    Senior Member Rockfish's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2005
    Location
    From FLA to GA as of 04/01/07
    Posts
    6,640
    Friggin too much!
    Join our efforts to Secure America's Borders and End Illegal Immigration by Joining ALIPAC's E-Mail Alerts network (CLICK HERE)

  4. #4
    MW
    MW is offline
    Senior Member MW's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2006
    Location
    North Carolina
    Posts
    25,717
    Thanks for the laugh, Gogo.

    "The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing" ** Edmund Burke**

    Support our FIGHT AGAINST illegal immigration & Amnesty by joining our E-mail Alerts athttps://eepurl.com/cktGTn

  5. #5
    Senior Member Gogo's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2007
    Location
    Alipacers Come In All Colors
    Posts
    9,909
    Got to laugh it is a "healing to your bones."
    Join our efforts to Secure America's Borders and End Illegal Immigration by Joining ALIPAC's E-Mail Alerts network (CLICK HERE)

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •