Thread: A Cure for Frozen Assets : Bring On Global Warning!

Published: January 18,2009Send to a friend
Op-Ed Contributor
A Cure for Frozen Assets : Bring On Global Warning!
Satire By John Lillpop



Fantastic weather makes living in the otherwise liberal lunacy of California sometimes bearable.

Indeed, musing about frigid conditions "back East" partially ameliorates the pain of residing within 50 miles of San Francisco, the city that has given the world Nancy Pelosi, Dianne Feinstein, Gavin Newsom, and the story line for Hollywood's "Milk."

According to the Weather Channel, Chicago languished in -10 degrees, while that -20 in New York City caused Katie Couric to don a ski cap, fur mittens, and solar-heated underwear in order to distort, misrepresent, and outright lie about the breaking news of the day!

Whilst Couric and other liberal pundits were showing off their frozen assets, things were balmy and beautiful here in what used to be God's country, before illegal aliens and Jihadists invaded.


For example, on one particularly delightful afternoon, the temp in San Jose reached 80 degrees, a 100 degree positive swing from the wicked conditions engulfing New York City which, because of it's liberal wackiness, deserves both -20 AND Katie Couric, in my humble opinion!

Meanwhile, the greatest snow job in history is about to dwarf the American Dream with an influx of Marxism and non-progressive prattle euphemistically called an "Inaugural Address."

On the afternoon of January 20, Barack Obama, America's newly crowned snowmaker-in-chief, will attempt to emulate one of the miracles performed by Jesus Christ.

However, whereas Jesus turned water into wine, the new age Messiah will attempt to convert tainted snow into "Change We Need" and "Post-Partisan" double talk.

Global warming? Bring it on!

Do it for the children!


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What I find amusing is how people who don't necessarily understand science point to the record breaking freezing conditions in the North-East as proof that global warming is false. Global warming doesn't mean that all parts of the world are going to be hot all the time, it simply means the AVERAGE temperature of the entire globe (calculated by taken various measurements from different locations using controlled variables) is increasing albeit at small increments. Now I'm not saying that I necessarily believe that that is what is happening, I'm simply trying to point out what 'global warming' really means. So when you have an average increase in temperature that means there's more energy in the atmosphere to create extreme conditions on both sides of the temperature scale (droughts and freezing conditions). A better argument against GW would be to find data disproving that the average temperature is increasing or that the rate of increase is not that worrisome.

Eagle, the whole discussion of Global Warming as man made is really what is at the center of the controversy. To believe that man is causing this phenomenon is to believe that humans have power over our weather. I don't believe it for a second. Al Gore, among others, is getting filthy rich frightening the uneducated and ignorant into believing that if they don't stop driving their old car or don't stop using so much electricity that the earth is going to burn up! What's the saying...There's a fool born every second...?

Originally Posted by EagleEye88

What I find amusing is how people who don't necessarily understand science point to the record breaking freezing conditions in the North-East as proof that global warming is false. Global warming doesn't mean that all parts of the world are going to be hot all the time, it simply means the AVERAGE temperature of the entire globe (calculated by taken various measurements from different locations using controlled variables) is increasing albeit at small increments. Now I'm not saying that I necessarily believe that that is what is happening, I'm simply trying to point out what 'global warming' really means. So when you have an average increase in temperature that means there's more energy in the atmosphere to create extreme conditions on both sides of the temperature scale (droughts and freezing conditions). A better argument against GW would be to find data disproving that the average temperature is increasing or that the rate of increase is not that worrisome.

Speaking of Al Gore, here's a little quote from his book "Earth in the balance"
"Refusing to accept the earth as our sacred mother, these Christians have become a dangerous threat to the survival of humanity. They are the blight on the enviroment and to believe in Bible prophecy is unforgivable."

Al Gore...what a guy

Originally Posted by MountainDog

Speaking of Al Gore, here's a little quote from his book "Earth in the balance"
"Refusing to accept the earth as our sacred mother, these Christians have become a dangerous threat to the survival of humanity. They are the blight on the enviroment and to believe in Bible prophecy is unforgivable."

The Middle Ages were warmer than today, and most important of all, people at that time considered the warmer temperatures a BLESSING. Longer growing seasons, ice-free northern ports, more food, economic booms and milder winters made life a much more pleasant experience for those living through those times.

Just goes to show you that even if man-made global warming does exist, is that automatically a bad thing? History has shown us warmer climate periods are a wonderful time for humanity. And obviously, the polar bears made it through the Middle Ages.

The Global Warming movement is about money and control, and nothing more.

TexasBorn wrote:

To believe that man is causing this phenomenon is to believe that humans have power over our weather. I don't believe it for a second.

Huh?!? Humans may not have absolute power over the weather but we can have an influence on the environment. This alone does influence our climate to some degree.

MW, I guess the point that I tried to make is that there are people who are getting filthy rich preaching global warming. Yes, we should be good stewards of our environment but some of the rhetoric has gone way beyond common sense. Also, regardless of what we are getting crammed down our throats, the jury is still out on this issue.

Originally Posted by MW

TexasBorn wrote:

To believe that man is causing this phenomenon is to believe that humans have power over our weather. I don't believe it for a second.

Huh?!? Humans may not have absolute power over the weather but we can have an influence on the environment. This alone does influence our climate to some degree.

TexasBorn wrote:

Also, regardless of what we are getting crammed down our throats, the jury is still out on this issue.

For some it's not, but I'm in your camp. I too am undecided on the issue.