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  1. #1
    Senior Member AirborneSapper7's Avatar
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    Maduro Reassures Venezuelans: "I'm A Socialist And I Know What I Am Doing"

    Maduro Reassures Venezuelans: "I'm A Socialist And I Know What I Am Doing"


    Submitted by Tyler Durden on 01/18/2014 19:42 -0500

    Venezuela's (freely elected) President Nicolas Maduro (amid toilet-paper and food shortages nation-wide) pointed out this in a State of the Nation address - which Bloomberg's Peter Jeffrey notes was unnecessary as everyone who lives in Venezuela knows the State of the Nation and it is Excruciating - "I'm a socialist, and I know what I'm doing." As Jeffrey ascorbically notes in this wonderful Op-ed, the Venezuelan treasury is now free to issue notes bearing the motto E Non Sequitur Gloria, or "Out of that which makes no sense shall we stitch the fabric of our glorious destiny."

    Via Peter Jeffrey of Bloomberg Extra,

    "I'm A Socialist, And I Know What I'm Doing"

    No, not me. Iím a monarchist and I need directions to Versailles. Iím talking about Nicolas Maduro, the president of Venezuela. Heís the socialist who knows what heís doing.
    He pointed it out this week in a State of the Nation address he neednít have given since everyone who lives in Venezuela already knows the State of the Nation and it is Excruciating.

    News to Me

    Still, it seemed to me a commanding reassurance: ďIím a socialist and I know what Iím doing.Ē The Venezuelan treasury is now free to issue notes bearing the motto E Non Sequitur Gloria, or ďOut of that which makes no sense shall we stitch the fabric of our glorious destiny.Ē (Itís OK. Iím a Latinist and I know what Iím doing.)
    It works with doctors. They do embarrassing things to embarrassing parts of you inflamed by embarrassing conditions and, if you look uncomfortable, may say with a smile, ďItís all right. Iím a doctor.Ē
    Thus did President Maduro, with his own avuncular bedside manner, let his comrades know that he had seen many such ugly inflammations, having created them himself, and that there was no need for embarrassment or concern.
    I am reminded also of the amorous warning Booth Jonathan gives Marnie on the High Line in the first season of ďGirls,Ē about what he intends to do to her in bed, noting that it might scare her, ďbecause Iím a man and I know how to do things.Ē
    So, what is Maduro doing, other than that?
    To be fair, he is just trying to whip inflation. To that end, he has removed the finance minister from his post after the guy presided over a doubling of consumer prices to 56 percent during his nine-month tenure, which has to be a record. Ted Williams, on his hottest streak, raised inflation by only 48 percent.
    Who is the new finance minister? An army brigadier general.
    What unsuccessful effort at battling inflation did the government try two months ago? Troops.
    Look, it seemed to make sense at the time. Itís a syllogism:
    We want to fight inflation
    Troops fight
    (Wait for it)
    Troops can fight inflation
    Quod erat demonstrandum. (Thatís on the other side of the nationís 12 million-bolivar note.)
    And the guy who failed to whip inflation as finance minister ó what is his fate?
    A. He has resigned in disgrace from public affairs.
    B. He has fled the country in the dead of night, stopping only at Arbyís for an Ultimate Angus (19 million bolivars but thatís with fries).
    C. He has dug a hidey hole, only deeper than Saddamís.
    D. He goes back to running the nationís central bank.
    Right.
    For Maduro is a socialist, and he knows what heís doing. Thatís why he decreed on Wednesday that company profits can no longer exceed 30 percent. A comfortable operating environment for J.C. Penney, yes, but a solution?
    Donít be so skeptical. Things are under control. As the vice president (whose motto is I am an oboist and I know when Iím squeaking) explained on Thursday, ďOur fundamental anchor is the dollar at 6.3 bolivars,Ē just as the Titanicís fundamental anchor was a rubber bath toy named Davey.
    Itís a war on inflation, so give war a chance. As Bloombergís Anatoly Kurmanaev and Corina Pons reported yesterday, Venezuelaís military men are now in charge of finance, industry, defense, the interior, and air and aquatic transport (hence the anchor). Thatís a lot of brains and brawn. Certainly a lot of brawn.
    Nobodyís saying Mision Cumplida. Thereís a lot of work to be done in Venezuela. Inflation is rampant. Goods are scarce. A 10-story-tall zombie of Hugo Chavez roams the streets squashing cars and giving three-hour speeches. OK, thatís next week.
    Life isnít easy. But Nicolas Maduro is a socialist. And thatís saying something.

    http://www.zerohedge.com/news/2014-0...hat-i-am-doing
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  2. #2
    Senior Member AirborneSapper7's Avatar
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    (amid toilet-paper and food shortages nation-wide)

    "I'm A Socialist, And I Know What I'm Doing"
    hahahahahaha .... Socialism, Marxism, Communism FAILS where ever it takes hold ... I guess the Socialist mind set is if you don't have food; you don't need a lot of toilet paper
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