Thread: The war on Christmas

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Frank's Saloon: Dec. 19, 2007
The war on Christmas
Pacifica Tribune Staff
Article Launched: 12/20/2007 10:39:06 AM PST

Allow me if you will, to venture to the edge of political incorrectness..." Merry Christmas!" There, I said it. I am bold.

Ah, Christmas. A ritual that carries with it, religious connotations and family tradition. What a happy time of the year.

So wouldn't it be nice if we were able to enjoy Christmas without all the crazies taking offense? It's no secret how that far-left leaning, ACLU and a lot of other people have tried to take the dreaded C word out of Christmas for years. Yeah, that and everything else associated with it.

Case in point... Last year in Newport News, Va., 10,000 people showed up for the town's Christmas celebration. Except some felt it would be more appropriate to call it Hollydazzle (that's holly by the way, not holy).

Somebody care to light the Christmas tree? Not in this town. Instead, officials lit, not the 40-foot Christmas tree but, get this, the tree of illumination.

Hey, I ain't kiddin' ya. You can't make this stuff up.

Remember when Target opted for generic holiday advertising by launching a campaign to replace Merry Christmas with, Happy Holidays? Gratefully, that backfired. A conservative Christian group threatened the retailer with a boycott 700,000 strong. Target's response? Their


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new campaign now includes the word "Christmas."
And leave it to American ingenuity to take up the gaulet and run with it...An Ohio couple sold almost 15,000, "Just say Merry Christmas" bracelets last year and expect to triple that figure in 2008.

And why not?

People are finally speaking up because they are tired of this onslaught against Christmas. They are tired of this movement that wants to eliminate God and religion from the public square.

I like the spin that Catholic League president, Bill Donohue, puts on it as he wants to know why people insist on "neutering" the holidays..."Elvis didn't sing about 'Blue Holiday,'" he said. "Nobody says, 'I'll be home for the holiday.' It's, 'I'll be home for Christmas.' If you can't say Christmas at Christmas time, when 85 percent of the population is Christian and 96 percent of the population celebrates Christmas, something's wrong."

Perhaps people who are offended by the use of the word Christmas, have "drunk too much from the multicultural well" and are victims of "political correctness run amok," said Donohue.

(From his lips to God's ear)

"A lot of people who are afraid to say Merry Christmas are actually Christians who don't want to, offend people," he added.

And then there is good ol' Sheriff Joe Arpaio of Maricopa County, Arizona. The tough talkin' lawman has ordered Christmas music - hymns and carols - to play throughout the county jail all day long. And for agnostics, he says he'll mix in the singing Chipmunks.

"We can't say 'Merry Christmas' in the U.S., in the world anymore," said Arpaio. "What are we coming to? I am saying it. I am singing it. It's gonna be in this jail and that's the way the ball bounces."

Way to go, Joe.

Even our beloved St. Nick can not escape the madness of the PC kooks. In Sydney, Australia, the Daily Telegraph reported that the US-based Westaff recruitment firm have been told not to use the traditional "ho ho ho" greeting because it may be offensive to women. Sydney's rent-a-Santa and department store Santa Clauses, have instead been instructed to say, "ha ha ha" instead.

One disgruntled Santa told the newspaper that the recruitment firm warned him not to use "ho ho ho" because it could frighten children and was too close to "ho", a US slang term for prostitute.

"Gimme a break," said Julie Gale, who runs a campaign called, Kids Free 2B Kids.

"We are talking about little kids who do not understand that "ho, ho, ho" has any other connotation and nor should they," she told the Telegraph.

And I say, leave Christ in Christmas where it belongs and leave our Santa alone. Before ya know it, some nut will come up with this brainstorm that Santa should lose weight so he would be a better role model for all our little curtain climbers and cookie snatchers.

What's that? Noooo! Your kiddin' me? Your not? Lisa, my barmaid and confidant, has just informed me that it's official...the big guy has already been nailed for setting a bad example. It seems that acting U.S. Surgeon General, Rear Adm. Steven K. Galson, brought the fat, jolly guy up in an interview after a presentation on obesity at the Boston Children's Museum... "It is really important that the people who kids look up to as role models are in good shape, eating well and getting exercise. It is absolutely critical"

Sometimes I gotta just laugh.

It helps alleviate the desire to break down in public and cry.


Ho, Ho, Ho! Shades of Don Imus?

Twas the night before A Politically Correct Christmas

'Twas the night before Christmas, and Santa was a wreck.

How to live in a world that's politically correct?

His workers no longer would answer to "Elves."

"Vertically Challenged," they were calling themselves;

The reindeer had vanished, without much propriety,

Released to the wilds by the Humane Society.

And as for the gifts, he'd never had a notion

That making a choice could cause so much commotion.

Nothing of leather, nothing of fur,

Which meant nothing for him, and nothing for her.

Nothing that might be construed to pollute.

Nothing to aim, nothing to shoot.

Nothing that clamored or made lots of noise.

Nothing for just girls, or just for the boys.

Nothing that claimed to be gender specific,

Nothing that's warlike, or non-pacifistic.

No baseball, no football, someone could get hurt;

Besides, playing sports exposed kids to the dirt.

He tried to be merry, he tried to be gay,

But you've got to be careful with that word today.

His sack was quite empty, limp to the ground;

Nothing acceptable was to be found.

Something special was needed, a gift that he might

Give to all without angering the left or the right.

A gift that would satisfy, with no indecision,

Each group of people, every religion;

Every ethnicity, every skin hue;

Everyone, everywhere - even you.

So here is that gift, it's priced beyond worth -

"May you and your loved ones enjoy peace on earth."

— Phillip Winn 1995

From the belly of this conservative beast, known as, Frank's Saloon; Lisa and I and all our documented and non-politically correct workers on staff, wish you and yours, a very Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year.

Contact Frank at: franksaloon@earthlink.net or leave a message at (650) 355-1700.


http://www.pacificatribune.com/localnews/ci_7770370

Good one Jim! I love it!

MERRY CHRISTMAS ACLU

The ACLU sucks!!!

MERRY CHRISTMAS EVERYONE!!!!!!!!