http://www.nydailynews.com/news/story/4 ... 3138c.html

Immig wives in peril
Abuse follows them to U.S.
BY HEIDI EVANS
DAILY NEWS STAFF WRITER

Marisol Tenesaca is kept from her children, who live in Ecuador where their dad threatens them unless she sends him all her wages.
One immigrant wife would be beaten if she tried to answer the phone or go out to buy milk for her child in her Queens neighborhood.

The reason: Her South Asian husband told her she couldn't be trusted with a dollar bill.

Another young woman, now living in Staten Island, was severely abused by two husbands - each arranged marriages from her native Pakistan. When she told her family she and her young son were being physically and psychologically tortured, they turned on her. "Why did you go to the police? .... You have to stay .... Just keep your son locked in his room," she was told.

They are the new faces of domestic violence in New York City, in what advocates say is an alarming and growing phenomenon among immigrant women.

They are caught between two worlds: one in America, where women have equal rights and domestic violence is a crime, and the other in their native lands, where cultural, religious and family traditions demand that women and girls be subservient, accept violence by their husbands, abuse by their in-laws, forced marriage and in some countries, genital mutilation.

When they arrive in New York City, they are often kept isolated indoors by their husbands. Some don't speak English. They are unfamiliar with American and New York law, afraid of being deported if they call police for help. If they disobey their violent and controlling husbands in any way, the men threaten to call immigration.

The lucky ones find their way to Sanctuary for Families, a not-for-profit advocacy group which provides safe shelter, immigration lawyers and counseling to 7,000 battered women and their young children.

Sanctuary is sponsoring a public forum moderated by Dan Rather tomorrow at the Asia Society, to highlight the challenges these women face when they seek to escape their abusers and build new lives.

The numbers are troubling.

In the past five years, the organization reports a rise in its immigrant clients - up to 62% from 49% of their overall adult population. They come from more than 100 different countries, and speak more than 120 different languages and dialects.

Moreover, a 2004 New York City Health Department report found that although 36% of city residents are foreign-born, immigrant women were significantly more likely to be killed by their intimate partners than U.S.-born women.

"Embedded in New York's immigrant struggle and success stories are a lot of hidden women and children who are victims of domestic violence," said Beth Silverman-Yam, clinical director at Sanctuary for Families. "We need to raise the level of awareness."

Hawa is one of the city's hidden immigant victims.

She came to the Bronx from Guinea, a reluctant bride who suffered for years at the brutal hands of an older man who sent for her.

"He worked nights driving a taxi and when he came home in the morning he would force me to stay in bed to have sex. I didn't want to. I wanted to get up for the children. If I don't agree he will hit me. It was, oh, God ...." her voice trailing off at the dark memory.

Hawa finally found the courage to get a court order of protection in 2003. Now safe in a modest two-bedroom apartment at an undisclosed location, her 5- and 7-year-old sons are happily unaware of the brave and difficult escape their mother made.

They go to public school, and live in the warm embrace of their mother, who works part-time as a home health aide and is going to school. Hawa said they sometimes ask when they can see their father.

"I tell them, 'Not yet. Not yet.'"