Today, I have taken a hard look around me. I see all the strife, contentions, anger, and hate. I can truly say to myself, I saw this coming 20 years ago and did nothing. Like everybody else around me waiting on the next guy to jump up I would join. Well as we know, nobody did. Some of the knowledge I was entrusted with and then later gained went to waste. To me, its like waiting to have a car accident. Only to react after the damage has occurred.

For several days now, I have revisited the knowledge I have and really have a deep guilt feeling come over me. I may have not made the difference, but if I could have steered one away that would have done it. I am watching the potential destruction of my beloved country with apathy from my countrymen just sitting on their duffs. Everybody talks a good game until it comes your turn to bat.

I have been for the last 30 years, always thought outside the box. Now, I guess that is considered hard liner right wing or ultrconservative. Seems like every year they stick another title on you. But never in my life have I ran with pack. I do not like people that try to control my thoughts or opinions. That is why I love this country. But considering the PAC here for the most part I enjoy sincerely. And with every group you do have the occasional head butt brush it off and keep going.

The way this country is going, each one must fight to finish the race. Even though sometimes it feels like your slamming on the brakes and holding on for dear life. I was told by someone here something that made me feel horribly ashamed of the weapon I was given so many years ago and had not used it. Can't remember word for word the exact wording, but it had something to do about sandbags. And that if we fail, because we are filling sandbags to keep the water out, then we will be the first to drown. The awakening that happened beacuse this person caused a door to be opened that had long since closed. And for that I am truly thankful. I don't know him or his age, but one of my shortcomings is I tend to think a younger generation a dumber that a box of rocks.

I am truly in admiration of some of the people here in this group. For some of you I had given up hope on a younger generation even to the point of fear.

I know this has nothing to do with nothing, but just had the feeling to jot some things down. I hope you won't mind.