Dear Senator Nelson,
RE: The Privilege of Paying Taxes

I must express my appreciation to Government for renovating the USA and establishing a dangerous, trashy third world cesspool for our enjoyment.

FCC: Bravo! Senator Feinstein is promoting the fairness doctrine, again. It is crucial that we be protected from freedom of speech. Freedom of speech is a silly outmoded concept.

DEPARTMENT OF HOMELAND SECURITY: Taxpayers are proud to contribute, on a local level, 61.5 billion each year to ascertain that 65 million invaders are blissful. Many Invaders have benevolently repaid our compulsory gifts by murdering 21,900 Citizens and by committing 240,000 violent sex offensives.

IRS: Pretending Pious charlatans proclaim religious tax-free status. It is lucrative to get Religion.
Invaders have so kindly demonstrated parasitic expertise. We owe them for this exposition. Giving less than the last dime, the last drop of water, the last drop of gas, the last green space, personal ID, the culture, language and life‘s blood is inexcusably, selfish behavior.

DEPARTMENT OF JUSTICE does a superlative job of persecuting law enforcement. Border Patrol Agents who have a gun at work certainly deserve 12 years in prison.

DEPARTMENT OF CONSUMER PROTECTION: Nancy A. Nord, Administrator, certainly deserved the huge bonus she received for allowing poison toothpaste, sleeping bags, grills, toys, etc. to harm/ kill Citizens.

HEALTH AND HUMAN SERVICES has graciously omitted discussion of minor medical imports such as tuberculosis, measles, polio, mumps, and leprosy. Admirably, they have remained focused, on exposure to third hand smoke on a beach, which will surely kill us.

EFFICIENCY: It was resourceful of Congress to avoid writing and reading legislation by delegating these chores to Corporations.

THE DEPARTMENT OF TRANSPORTATION: Mary Peters, a genius public servant, devised a way to build the NAFTA superstructures with taxpayer money, on confiscated Citizen property, charging a toll to taxpayer users for the unwanted and unaffordable globalization escapade. A huge bonus is recommended.

DEPARTMENT OF VETERANS AFFAIRS: Trips, liquor, banquets, lingerie, and fancy hotels on the credit card of taxpayers are absolutely necessary. Services to Veterans are so yesterday.

FDA: FDA scientists are rewarded for extraordinary cunning. They manage to earn millions serving as Directors and stockholders in drug companies whose products they regulate for the protection of Citizens.

DEPARTMENT OF LABOR: Brilliant Elaine Chao smashed annoying Citizens for requesting fair labor laws. She simply rewrote visa regulations and earned the esteem of slave labor proponents.

DEPARTMENT OF EDUCATION: A celebration is required, to acknowledge the accomplishment, of socially engineering the best school systems in the World into failing abominations.

PENTAGON: The decision, to outsource military technology and jobs, was inspirational.

FEDERAL FINANCIAL REGULATORS: Magnificent maneuvers guaranteeing crooks profits using taxpayer money.

Eternal gratitude,